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Welcome to Marmee's Pantry

Friday, April 13, 2012

The Worth of a Stay-at-Home Mom

"I have been reminded of your sincere faith, which first lived in your grandmother Lois and in your mother Eunice and, I am persuaded, now lives in you also." ~II Timothy 1:5

"The hand that rocks the cradle rules the world."

I'm SURE that by now you have heard of the ridiculous, incredibly rude, self-centered, uneducated, uninformed, prejudicial (but I sugar coat) remark made by Hilary Rosen, one of B.O.'s head strategists about Ann Romney AND ALL stay-at-home moms in America ~ "She's never worked a day in her life." It reminded me of something that happened to me a while back . . .

About 15 years ago, I lead a homeschool Girl Scout troop. Our local council was in the midst of brain-storming for a function about "career choices" for women; so that "our girls" could start thinking about what they wanted to do when they started considering their careers & college choices. Oh, they were SO excited about it . . . they were going to have all local career women with tables & booths & each one would talk about their fantastic jobs. Woohoo!

They had booked a local realtor, a teacher, a scientist, a business owner, an artist, a Mary Kay lady, a police woman, and some others that I can't remember . . . but . . . I happened to notice that there was NO STAY-AT-HOME MOM.

I brought this up to the leader of the project ~ "Excuse me, but are there any plans for a stay-at-home or homeschool mom?" ~ & she & the ladies standing in the group with her looked at me in stunned silence. When they finally got their collective whits together, they smiled that "oh, she must be humored" smile & stutteringly said, "Oh . . . well . . . if YOU would like to bring THAT aspect to the floor, YOU are welcome to." I think I shocked them even more when I said, "I would LOVE to!" You could nearly read their collective thoughts ~ "Oh, crud!" . . . or . . . um . . . something to that effect.

So, the day of the program, I set up my little table. I brought our Prairie Primer unit study that we were doing that year & all sorts of projects the girls had done, books they'd read, photos of field trips and activities; I even had some homemade soap I'd made. Everyone dutifully went around to every table & looked at all the goodies the ladies had brought and asked any questions they had. When they got to mine, many moms seemed "suddenly" a little sheepish & embarrassed, but I joyfully told them our story & answered their obligatory questions.

I think the most
chilly the room became was when I got up to make my presentation. I told them that I had the high honor & privilege of NOT ONLY taking care of my family, but I was our daughters' teacher, as well! I went over the chores that I did on a daily & weekly basis ~ yes, I did laundry with homemade laundry detergent, I made soap, I tried to cook from scratch, I mopped & swept, I dusted ~ you could see many of the moms snickering & the little girls looking at me with a look of dread. BUT ~ the clincher was my closing ~ it went something like this . . .

"The very best part of my job is that I GET to stay home with my girls all day long! I GET to not only work with them, but to play with them any time I want. I GET to be home with them when they are sick & not HAVING to worry about losing my job by taking off work to be with them, I GET to take them on fun field trips. And most of all, I GET to hug & kiss them & tell them & show them how much I love them any time I want!"

My applause was a little tepid & I didn't have many moms gathering around my table while I was tearing down, like some of the other presenters did, but I think I made many of the attendees ~ young & not so young ~ think & take notice of the worth of a stay-at-home-homeschool mom.

Blessings from Ohio . . . Kim<><


  1. Great post! I loved it!!! SAHM the BEST job in the whole world!

  2. Oh, my goodness, Kim; how I wish I could have been there. I'd have cheered you on, wearing one big, happy, full-of-joy smile, too. I'm in awe of homeschooling moms, and you top them all, making such things from scratch. I'm a stay-at-home mom, and you are so right about the freedom to meet our kids' needs without worrying about losing our jobs. The flexibility to work out of our home has been a stress saver, big time. The added bonus of well-rounded, secure children is one I continue to praise our Lord for, too.

    BTW, "The Resurrection Song" playing in the background is one of my absolute favorites!
    ~Lori Cripe

  3. oh Kim, you are an inspiration to me. I applaud you! I LOVE you and surely enjoy chatting with you!

  4. I feel very blessed to GET to do these things too:) I wonder if sometimes career women just don't know what they are missing, or maybe have to work or have a husband who expects them to, and some of these snarky comments are made out of frustration.

    We are very blessed.

  5. Awesome!! I think most moms start to feel just a little guilty when they come across a you or I or Ann Romney. The usual response is "Oh I could never do that. They would drive me crazy."
    Sad,isn't it.
    I am so thankful for the privalege I had to stay home and raise and teach my 7 children. :-)
    Great post!

    1. A agree. I breaks my heart when I hear moms ~ at Christmas or summer break ~ talk about how they can't wait for their kids to go back to school b/c they're driving them crazy. Sad. So very, very sad. We ALL know families in such situations that the mom HAS to work outside her home ~ especially in this economy ~ but to do it by choice & miss all those years w/your children . . . it puzzles me.

  6. Good for you! That is awesome, and I would have done the same thing! Bless you.

  7. I admire your courage. It is hard to stand up and be counted for what you hold dear and right, knowing that it is counter to most of those you were speaking to. I hope that the people who heard your presentation took to heart what you said and in some way took something away that they could apply to their own life.
    I homeschooled for 17 years. My two boys, my husband and I had a wonderful life full of simple things, learning, working and experiencing all the goodness God had waiting for us to partake of. It was lovely for us as long as we stayed in our own little "bubble", but there was harsh weather beyond the bubble. Our lives didn't blend well with, as some would call it, "the real world". Both family and community were not very supportive and we pretty much had to go it alone. We started homeschooling shortly after it became legal in North Carlina, long before developed curriculums and homeschool support groups. I had moments when I felt like maybe the others were right, that I was hurting my children's prospects by not dropping them into the "norm" of day care and public school, where they would be socialized and learn to fit in... but then I would see their happy faces as they pursued their own interests, stretched themselves and grew under our watchful eye. It was right for us... what we did would not be right for everyone, but it worked for our family. Now my young men are grown, they are self starting, confident, and respected. They still live life on their own terms and have been prospered by their heavenly Father. I am content that we did the right thing for our kids.
    I hope that you also are content and that your efforts at trying to share your experiences are met with curiosity and enthusiasm.
    Blessings, Elle

    1. Thank you for your thoughtful comment. I'm SURE your young men are ~ & will be ~ successful in whatever they pursue. The greatest gift of homeschooling ~ besides family ties ~ is learning how to learn. This, in itself, fosters a love of learning.

  8. yay Kim! that's fantastic! we need more women like you, willing to stand up and be counted!

  9. I want to commend you for having the courage to BE YOURSELF while among others who did not respect or value your contributions. I'm wondering how your girls felt about it. I bet they were proud of you.


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