Friday, May 14, 2010

Growing Older & Enjoying It

Just in case you didn't know it, I'm 51 years old. WOW! WHEN did that EVER happen to ME?!?! It wasn't until I was in my 30s that life finally seemed to start 'clicking.' Know what I mean? Yes, there are always going to be times of family strife; yes, that's when our kids are growing and active and going in 20 different directions; yes, that's about the time we start losing our gr-parents, parents, uncles, aunts...even some of our childhood friends. It seems that that's when life starts getting 'REAL'. If you weren't close to the Lord before that time in your life, then that's when you either sink - and walk away because you forgot that we DO live in a sinful world after all, BUT God is still on the Throne and He still loves us and has an awesome plan for our lives...OR...you swim - you stay afloat, you dog paddle, you rely more deeply on the Lord and draw closer BECAUSE you realize that this sinful, fallen world isn't "IT." That there's more and the Lord is your ultimate reward.

That realization is what makes life work, what makes it do-able, what gives me my joy in the hard, sad times. Just like the "Footprints" poem says, that's when Jesus carries me. And, having been a Daddy's Girl, I LOVE being carried and cuddled by my Daddy...my Heavenly Father!

But I digress a little. Below is an e-mail that a dear friend of mine sent me about growing older. Although there are parts in it that show it probably wasn't written by a Christian, the gist of it is OH SO TRUE. As I said earlier, I was probably in my 30s before I started really coming into my own. Living life the way we thought the LORD was leading us and NOT what culture, society, the "old guard" at church, fashion, parents, in-laws...WHOEVER...ANYONE who isn't living OUR lives says we should be living it! It's not that I don't care what others think, I just don't care enough to take their well-meaning, uninformed criticism of my homeschooling, my regarding my husband as the head of my home, my raising my daughters to look forward to being wives and mothers, my finding joy in small things, my wanting to learn more about gardening or making my own household cleaners and personal items instead of "simply going to the store," if I traded the high heels and dress suits of my modeling/make up artist days for well-worn jeans, funky jewelry and Burkenstocks!!...among other things. I'm sure YOU have been there, too.

Well, all that to say. I really enjoyed the little story below...w/a few little comments added by me [ ]. It spoke of a lot of my feelings (except for sleeping 'til noon!) w/o being disrespectful. And if any of you are younger than me by more than 10-20 years, I hope you learn this lesson VERY SOON. There IS a "great freedom that comes with aging." Enjoy the ride!
Blessings from Ohio, Kim Wolf<><

Old Age, I decided, is a gift!

I am now, probably for the first time in my life, the person I have always wanted to be. Oh, NOT my body! I sometimes despair over my body, the wrinkles, the baggy eyes, and the sagging butt. And often I am taken aback by that old person that lives in my mirror (who looks like my mother! [I'm looking more like my Dad & my aunt! KW<><]), but I don't agonize over those things ... for long.

I would never trade my amazing friends, my wonderful life, my loving family, for less gray hair or a flatter belly. As I've aged, I've become more kind to myself, and less critical of myself. I've become my own friend.

I don't chide myself for eating that extra cookie, or for not making my bed, or for buying that silly cement goose that I didn't need, but looks so avante garde on my patio. I am entitled to a treat, to be messy, to be extravagant.

I have seen too many dear friends leave this world too soon; before they understood the great freedom that comes with aging.

Whose business is it if I choose to read or play on the computer until 4 a.m. and sleep until noon?

I will dance with myself to those wonderful tunes of the 60s and 70s, and if I, at the same time, wish to weep over a lost love...I will.

I will walk the beach in a swim suit that is stretched over a bulging body, and will dive into the waves with abandon if I choose to, despite the pitying glances from the 'jet set.' They, too, will get old. [Haha! Joke's on them!]

I know I am sometimes forgetful. But there again, some of life is just as well forgotten. And I eventually remember the important things.

Sure, over the years my heart has been broken. How can your heart NOT break when you lose a loved one, or when a child suffers, or even when somebody's beloved pet gets hit by a car? But broken hearts are what give us strength and understanding and compassion. [II Cor. 1:3-4] A heart never broken is pristine and sterile and will never know the joy of being imperfect.

I am SO blessed to have lived long enough to have my hair turning gray, and to have my youthful laughs be forever etched into deep grooves on my face. So many have never laughed, and so many have died before their hair could turn silver.

As you get older, it is easier to be positive. You care less about what other people think. I don't question myself anymore. I've even earned the right to be wrong.
So, to answer your questions, I like being old. It has set me free. I like the person I have become. I am not going to live forever, but while I am still here, I will not waste time lamenting what could have been, or worrying about what will be. And I shall eat dessert every single day. (IF I feel like it!)

5 comments:

  1. I enjoyed that, Kim. It is very
    freeing to embrace this stage of
    life. We're not getting older,
    we're getting better.
    Peace,
    Sandy

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  2. Love this, KIm! My younger sisters are giving me grief over turning 50 next week, like it's supposed to bother me. I tell one of them how funny I think it is that her oldest grandchild is older than my youngest son!

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  3. That is great. I turned 50 last September and my kids think I am ancient...little do they realize, they will be here one day too.

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  4. Great post!! Life delievers many seasons...we have to learn to dance in each one!!

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  5. I love the picture of the hands. Somewhere I have pics of mins and my husbands hands when we painted this house the first time we moved here and began fixing it up. Then later when we got married and With the babies hands I want to continue taking more of our hands ...

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